Legally Blonde

by Mark Rivers

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain cell?
A: Gifted.

Q: How do blonde brain cells die?
A: Alone.

Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.

Replace the word "blonde" with "nigger," and try telling them at the office. It won't work. You won't be working for much longer, either; you will be fired for having committed a "hate crime."

Type in "blonde jokes" in the Yahoo search box, and it will come up with 36 sites, and over 88,000 web page matches. The same sort of results are found when you type in "redneck jokes" or "white trash jokes." When you type in "nigger jokes," however, there are only 2,970 web page matches.

Too many, you say? Well, don't worry, many of them have been removed from the web. The top site, in fact,, has been shut down by its Jewish owner, Jeri ROOSENBERG. You can reach Jeri at if you would care to discuss it with him.

Whites are fair game to the Jews in Hollywood; that's why a movie like Legally Blonde can exist, but a movie called Dumb-ass Negroes cannot.

In Legally Blonde, Reese Witherspoon plays Elle Woods, an intelligent, yet ditzy blonde who is dumped by her Boston-bred boyfriend upon his acceptance to Harvard Law School.

Elle decides to use what intelligence and motivation she has to get accepted into Harvard, and win him back. The admissions team, a group of horny old goats, is more than pleased to let her in upon seeing her jiggle-filled application video.

Right away, Elle has to deal with the snobbery of her fellow White students (I didn't realize there were still so many Whites going to Harvard), but she uses her knowledge of fashion to triumph in the end.

I liked the fact that they at least made Elle intelligent; that her brain got her out of more jams than her boobs. What bothered me about the movie was:

A) Her White ex-boyfriend was a snooty rich-kid, who was under the thumb of his old-money family legacy;

B) Her White law professor turned out to be a slimy old pervert who only wanted to get into her pants;

C) Her manicurist friend in Boston suffered at the hands of her "White Trash," trailer-dwelling ex-husband;

D) The judge was a negress.

The last item is what bothered me the most about Legally Blonde. If you are one of the TV addicts who watches courtroom dramas on a regular basis, can you remember the last time the judge was NOT a negress? There seems to be some sort of fictional quota the Jews are trying to achieve.

In real life, I'll bet negresses make up less than one per cent of the nation's judges. Yet, every time I turn around, I see one sitting at the bench, looking dignified. Then I hear the comments of the REAL negresses, two rows behind me:

"Ooh, girl, Ah's go'n git my hair done jest like that!"

"Yeah, me too. Den AH'S go'n be a judge too, lawd-a-mercy! Hyuk, hyuk!"

Despite the relative racial neutrality of Legally Blonde, the one thing that marred it the most was the obligatory presence of this bogus negress judge.

So, should you go see it? No. It's not worth your time or money. Read a book instead. Improve your mind instead of contributing to the Jew hypno-machine for 90 more minutes.

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