Do-It-Yourself News Article

by Mark Rivers


As a public service, Vanguard News Network is offering this template to help inexperienced journalists write their first news piece about racially conscious White people. Let's say you're a cub reporter at a TV station or newspaper in a mid-size city. Your editor tells you about a racist leafleting in the area (crime of the century, right?), and assigns you to the story. You also get the numbers of the local ADL, JDL, SPLC and NAACP...since they are "experts" on these matters. Don't worry about trying to refute any of the facts in the leaflets themselves. Just be sure you use the word "hate" a lot.

____(1)____

Our peaceful community was shadowed by ____(2)____ yesterday as ____(3)____ fliers were left on lawns and on windshields, filled with ____(4)____ remarks about ____(5)____ and ____(6)____.

Said one resident, ____(7)____. Local police say they are ____(8)____, and law enforcement officers will be ____(9)____.

Hymie Danglestein, local spokesman for the ____(10)____, was outraged. ____(11)____, he commented. Danglestein added that the group cited on the fliers, ____(12)____, is responsible for inspiring such atrocities as ____(13)____. "With any luck," Danglestein noted, ____(14)____.

1. a) TOWN SPLATTERED WITH HATE LITERATURE
    b) LOCALS UPSET OVER HATE GROUP'S RANTINGS
    c) POLICE STUMPED AS TO IDENTITY OF HATERS
    d) JEWS OFFER ADVICE TO HELP US GET RID OF HATEMONGERS

2. a) hate
    b) hateful speech
    c) the specter of hatred
    d) hate-filled rhetoric

3. a) racist
    b) anti-Semitic
    c) racist AND anti-Semitic
    d) non-kosher

4. a) hurtful
    b) unkind
    c) less than flattering
    d) indiscreet, though not at all inaccurate

5. a) African-Americans
    b) homosexuals
    c) Latin-American immigrants
    d) Asian-Americans

6. a) Jewish people
    b) other minority groups
    c) our beloved president's foreign policy
    d) anyone whose name does not rhyme with "Hitler"

7. a) "I didn't know such things were still around in this enlightened day and age."
    b) "I didn't know such things were legal. Are you sure they can't be arrested for this?"
    c) "Oy! Those horrid goyim! Kill them all! Why must there be so much hatred?"
    d) "Well, they have a right to free speech just like any...hey, where are you going?"

8. a) "concerned"
    b) "worried about possible terrorist acts"
    c) "baffled"
    d) "glad that some White folks are finally standing up to...hey, where are you going?"

9. a) "on the lookout for suspicious activity."
    b) "rounding up White suspects in accordance with the wishes of our Jewish masters."
    c) "conducting an investigation by eating doughnuts and flirting with teenage girls in grocery store parking lots."
    d) "doing absolutely nothing to stop it, as we secretly approve of...hey!"

10. a) Anti-Defamation League, a watchdog organization that monitors hate groups, and just happens to be run by Jews
      b) Jewish Defense League, a hate organization dedicated to stamping out hatred -- against Jews
      c) Southern Poverty Law Center, which, despite its name, is concerned mostly with tarring White groups with the "hate" brush
      d) National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, which was founded and is still heavily influenced by Jews

11. a) "Oy! When will the hatred end?"
      b) "Why? Why must people hate?"
      c) "Those accursed goyim have gone too far this time!"
      d) "Hey, they're absolutely right about us. We're scum (I'm a self-hating Jew)."

12. a) the National Alliance
      b) the World Church of the Creator
      c) the European Unity and Rights Organization
      d) the National Association for the Advancement of White People

13. a) the 1995 Oklahoma City bombing and the murder of Denver DJ Alan Berg
      b) the great Chicago fire and the breakup of Van Halen
      c) the black plague, dead puppies and itchy wool sweaters
      d) every evil known to man

14. a) "we can rid the world of hate once and for all."
      b) "our Lord Yahweh will help us to smite this pestilence called the White race."
      c) "this article will spook more goyim into thinking that racism is illegal."
      d) "...hey, you're not a bad looking shiksa. How about giving me a blowjob?"

MARK RIVERS

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